Knowing myself

I like to think I know myself pretty well.  I think I'm very self aware.  The only problem with that is that I've thought that for several years.  Many years even.  But I'm constantly becoming more self aware.  So what does that mean?

It basically means I overanalyze. 

It also means that I have a habit of self correction and modification.  I very much like that about myself.  I like seeing something I don't like about my personality or mannerisms and setting about to change it.  I like knowing that I am a completely different person now than I was even 1 short year ago.  That is how fast personal growth can occur if you are genuinely interested in it and objectively look at yourself. 

It's also imperative that you understand the people around you.  The reason this is imperative is that you need to know who's opinions to take to heart and who's opinions to throw in the garbage.  Lots of them belong in the garbage, but there are always those select few.

Is this process also self torture?  YES!  Do I sometimes hate this aspect of myself more than I love it?  YES! YES! YES!  That's the beauty of it.

Who can turn the random person from cool as a cucumber to homicidal maniac in 5 seconds flat?  Usually, it's either your mother or your spouse.  Conversely, when you are in pain or heartbroken, who's name do you call?  Usually, it's either your mother or your spouse. 

So interesting how our emotions work.